About this Episode
It’s time for the year-end round table! Episode 57 on Foster Care, Adoption & the Church was a hit, so we are revisiting the theme of foster care, adoption, and the church while adding new voices. Our guests are Darren Freidinger, Amber Nelson, and Jessica Autrey, each has fostered and/or adopted children including special needs children and international adoptions. In this episode, we discuss ways in which churches and individuals can practically care for orphans and their families ensuring vulnerable children will grow up in loving families.
Our guests are here to share their experiences with the state, private adoption agencies, and churches. If you have ever considered adoption, this episode is a must! And if you haven’t ever considered adopting or fostering, this episode is still a must, as our guests are passionate advocates for children and want to see more placements in Christian homes.
If our guests cannot convince you to foster or adopt, you will still be given food for thought as we ask questions like: What do Christian anarchists think about the state being involved with vulnerable children? Is adoption easier through the state or private adoption agencies? How many families are willing and waiting to adopt children? Why are churches not ensuring children have healthy and safe homes? What can Christians do to help families rearing adopted children?
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Episode Timestamps:
1:05 - Guest introductions
Darren
Returning guest from episode 57
Popular episode with good response
Two adopted daughters
Fostering 3 younger children, waiting to begin their adoption processes
Jessica
Eight children, 3 are adopted from Ukraine in 2011
Amber
Music Teacher in public school
Three sons
8:15 – How do we feel about the state being involved in child foster care?
Craig:
Doesn’t like the state being involved in child protection
Darren:
As bad as the situation is for children right now, the state made the right call on the girls in his care
Christ following parents need to be involved
The church could do better than the state
Amber:
The children of addicts and mental health problems need better equipped helpers.
Child safety is top priority
As a schoolteacher, she saw that the caseworkers were so overwhelmed that referrals did not help suspected abused children
Jessica:
Real cases fall through the cracks
But when parents make decisions such as not vaccinating them, the state may become involved
Wanted to adopt from her first child to ensure children had the love she wanted to give her son
Saw a blog about the conditions of special needs orphans in Eastern Europe
Special needs children are discarded
Orphanage care is patchy, but especially terrible for special-needs children
Experience in helping people with Downs Syndrome
22:09 – Roe v Wade
When people are happy about the overturning, they should be willing to adopt kids
It is easier to adopt children from other countries because the US government interferes
It took Amber a year to get a license to adopt
There are a lot of arbitrary rules that change between case-workers
There are invasions of privacy while you foster
The state is an obstacle to adoption
There is a waiting list for adopting infants
The children come with traumas
Roe v Wade did not end abortion, just sent the decision back to the states
It’s just politics
Older children, sibling groups or those born with health issues face barriers to adoption
33:20 – Adoption and the church
Why are churches not ensuring children have healthy and safe homes?
Craig has never heard it in church
When Amber has heard it is has been an addendum to the service
The Baptist church sometimes runs training for foster parents
There’s no sermons about it
Darren’s experience in church has been hit-and-miss
His church has a November adoption month
Darren wants individuals helping families adopting children
Babysit the children and let the parents go shopping
Hang out with parents with eight children
Have an adult conversation
At least don’t judge or ask silly questions
Amber had some good experiences of help from individuals
Jessica has not seen adoption preached
Christians helped Jessica to make the adoption process happen through donations
Now attends a pro-adoption church
47:21 – Is the state still involved in private adoptions?
Yes, there is paperwork and administrative processes
Even privately there is a mountain of paperwork
In Darren’s experience fostering through the state was easier
But the state is involved to an intimate degree though
52:30 – What can individuals do to help families with adopted children?
Jessica:
Voice your support for families with adopted or fostered children
Tell them if you are praying for them
Don’t give useless advice
Do give hand-me-downs
Just show up and play with the kids or give adult conversations
Show up to fundraisers and get the word out
Amber:
Think about what the kids go through, then consider adopting
Do laundry, that would help
Darren:
Agrees with Jessica and Amber
Consider adopting or fostering
The children need Christians
Take someone a meal when they take charge of their children
Take the kids to the park for an hour
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